Deadpool: The fight against FF!
by TwinklyMuffin
Summary: Deadpool finds himself a strange world, and he needs YOUR help to guide him through!


"Ooof…the hell just happened?" Deadpool muttered, picking himself off of the ground. "One minute, I'm buying groceries, and the next, I'm…whatever this place is."

The mercenary looked around, taking in the rolling green hills, the chirping birds, and the blooming flowers.

"I don't think we're in New York anymore, Toto." Deadpool said aloud, looking at his feet. No canine companion was there to greet him. "Riiiiight, I don't have a dog." He said. "There goes the idea this may be a dream, then. There's no dog…"

Deadpool looked himself over.

"And no dress. I bet I'm missing the pigtails, too. Well, I guess I understand that. I wouldn't want to catch the Swine Flu. Now, to figure out where I am…"

"Hiya!" came a voice from behind him. Deadpool whirled around, and saw no one. Looking down, he saw a short figure…it appeared to be a fox, with two tails…and tennis shoes.

"My name is Mil—"

"IT WANTS TO YIFF ME!" Deadpool screamed, swiftly drawing his handguns and pumping the atrocity against nature full of lead. "DIE, YOU FURRY FREAK!"

The "furry" gurgled, blood frothing from his mouth. Slowly, it fell to the ground.

"Oh god, that was a close one. Ma always told me to watch out for those things." Deadpool muttered, placing his guns back in their holsters. Suddenly, another voice reached Deadpool's ears, this one more scratchy and annoying than should be humanly possible.

"TAILS!" the voice cried in despair. Deadpool cringed.

"God, that sounds like Jason Griffith…" he remarked. Turning he found himself looking at an anthropomorphic hedgehog. "More toddlers in fursuits?"

"Tails, speak to me bud!" the hedgehog wept, tears pouring from his single eye.

"Tails…as in, from Sonic the Hedgehog 2?" Deadpool asked the weeping figure. "Then…you're Sonic! Man, I loved your games! Until you turned into a wolf and had a talking sword and---"

"Sonic! What happened to Tails?" screamed an echidna. Deadpool tried to recognize the character, but he couldn't. It was a dark green echidna, wearing form-fitting black leather. Her arm was decorated in tribal tattoos. She fell to her knees, crying, with her arm around Sonic.

"Jadeemerald, how could this happen…?" Sonic sobbed, looking at the echidna. The echidna shook her head.

"I…I don't know…but we'll get through this. Together." She replied, before moving in and kissing Sonic.

"HOLY CRAP!" Deadpool yelled, causing Sonic and Jadeemerald to jump. "I know what you are! You're a _fan character_!" shrieked the mercenary, whipping out his katanas and holding them to the throats of the two anthropomorphic animals.

"Sonic, I'm scared!" Jadeemerald girl gasped, fresh tears erupting.

"You represent everything wrong with the internet! And you!"

Deadpool turned his head to Sonic.

"You aren't really Sonic! You're just in this beast's imagination!" he continued, his arms tensing. "I'm gonna end this nightmare right here, right now! Bon voyage, demons!"

SHINK.

There were no longer heads on the bodies. And then…there were no longer bodies. There wasn't even a Green Hill Zone. Deadpool was standing in a blank white room.

"I know where I am now. And it's not Oz." he growled, looking upward. Sure enough, there is was. In the URL bar.

". I should have known my old nemesis would come back to haunt me." Deadpool said, as he sheathed his swords. "I've gotta high-tail it outta here. Prolonged exposure to this place could turn me into…and _otaku_." Deadpool shuddered. "But where do I go next…"

There were three groups of floating blue text in front of him.

"Kingdom Hearts, Naruto, and Invader Zim…Which one do I choose. They all sound horrible. Hey! You! Readers!"

Deadpool turns his head to the screen, looking directly at you.

"You guys choose which one I go to, okay? I don't know much about this _Failfiction _place, so you'll have to be my guide, my eyes, ears, hands, nose, and tongue, got it? Good. Now, leave your suggestion in the comment box. Oh, and don't choose anything crappy, okay? I have a very sensitive tummy."


End file.
